Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Romney - Adoption or Excommunication for Single Mom

How much does Romney respect women?  Here is the infamous place your baby up for adoption or face possible excommunication.  I guess if she was a lesbian, he would have knocked her down and cut off her hair, but he showed restraint - just excommunication for non-compliance.
So much for Mormons being Family Friendly to single mothers.  Single mothers work hard, harder than stay-at-home moms most times.  And when the father isn't in the home, nor paying child support, a single mother wanting to love and raise her baby should be encouraged; not threatened - bad Romney, bad Mormon.

Three short paragraphs from:  http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/2012/02/mitt-romney-201202 - I broke up the long paragraphs for easier reading online.

This is a very good expose on the antics of Mitt Romney that is well worth reading, I'm not high lighting one section on bullying a single mother to choose adoption or potential excommunication.

The Meaning of Mitt - by Michael Kranish and Scott Helman

By 1983, Hayes was 23 and back in the Boston area, raising a 3-year-old daughter on her own and working as a nurse’s aide. Then she got pregnant again. Single motherhood was no picnic, but Hayes said she had wanted a second child and wasn’t upset at the news. “I kind of felt like I could do it,” she said. “And I wanted to.”

By that point Mitt Romney, the man whose kids Hayes used to watch, was, as bishop of her ward, her church leader. But it didn’t feel so formal at first. She earned some money while she was pregnant organizing the Romneys’ basement. The Romneys also arranged for her to do odd jobs for other church members, who knew she needed the cash. “Mitt was really good to us. He did a lot for us,” Hayes said.

Then Romney called Hayes one winter day and said he wanted to come over and talk. He arrived at her apartment in Somerville, a dense, largely working-class city just north of Boston. They chitchatted for a few minutes. Then Romney said something about the church’s adoption agency.
Hayes initially thought she must have misunderstood. But Romney’s intent became apparent: he was urging her to give up her soon-to-be-born son for adoption, saying that was what the church wanted. Indeed, the church encourages adoption in cases where “a successful marriage is unlikely.”

(Author's paragraph break)

Hayes was deeply insulted. She told him she would never surrender her child. Sure, her life wasn’t exactly the picture of Rockwellian harmony, but she felt she was on a path to stability. In that moment, she also felt intimidated.

Here was Romney, who held great power as her church leader and was the head of a wealthy, prominent Belmont family, sitting in her gritty apartment making grave demands. “And then he says, ‘Well, this is what the church wants you to do, and if you don’t, then you could be excommunicated for failing to follow the leadership of the church,’ ” Hayes recalled.

It was a serious threat. At that point Hayes still valued her place within the Mormon Church. “This is not playing around,” she said. “This is not like ‘You don’t get to take Communion.’ This is like ‘You will not be saved. You will never see the face of God.’ ” Romney would later deny that he had threatened Hayes with excommunication, but Hayes said his message was crystal clear: “Give up your son or give up your God.”

(Author's paragraph break)

Not long after, Hayes gave birth to a son. She named him Dane. At nine months old, Dane needed serious, and risky, surgery. The bones in his head were fused together, restricting the growth of his brain, and would need to be separated. Hayes was scared. She sought emotional and spiritual support from the church once again.

Looking past their uncomfortable conversation before Dane’s birth, she called Romney and asked him to come to the hospital to confer a blessing on her baby. Hayes was expecting him. Instead, two people she didn’t know showed up.

She was crushed. “I needed him,” she said. “It was very significant that he didn’t come.” Sitting there in the hospital, Hayes decided she was finished with the Mormon Church. The decision was easy, yet she made it with a heavy heart. To this day, she remains grateful to Romney and others in the church for all they did for her family. But she shudders at what they were asking her to do in return, especially when she pulls out pictures of Dane, now a 27-year-old electrician in Salt Lake City. “There’s my baby,” she said.


Mitt, a pretty good bully to have in the White House, I have to wonder how many black eyes Ann suffered until she fell in line as a proper Mormon woman. - Timothy


  1. "Ye are all gods.." it's from the bible and it must have been one of Jesus' favorite quotes because he used it when his attackers said the same of him. As for Romney's advice:

    ‎"Romney, who considers his counseling advice to Hayes confidential, received permission from Hayes yesterday to release a "limited statement" on the matter.

    In the statement, Romney said he urged the adoption route because Hayes' child was born out of wedlock. "This was Peggy's second child," he said. ''At the time, Peggy was not working, had no visible means of support and was living on welfare. She was also a member of a family that had had severe problems in many different ways which, to protect Peggy's privacy, I will not go into in this statement."

    Romney also said Hayes' allegations about possible sanctions is "simply not true." He noted that, after their counseling sessions, she continued to have a relationship with his family and the Mormon Church provided her with welfare funds."


  2. Mitt's advice was therefore good advice.. given the woman's situation at the time. He was considering what sort of life the child would have born into an unstable situation. We see many children who grow up suffering and being left behind for lack of proper financial support. This should not be equated to 'bullying'.. it's just practical advice.. but hard advice.. the Mormon church does not excommunicate people easily.